Member-only story
In our office at the university where I work, we’re fortunate to receive generous time off benefits each year, including approximately two days of vacation per month, at least one day of sick leave per month, a few days for holidays of our choosing, plus the standard holidays, which even include a week off at Christmas. Despite working many extra hours and having a son with autism, which means we rarely go on vacations, I do use some of this time for necessary appointments and family obligations. Yet, the question of how best to utilize my vacation time remains.
Recently, I decided to take some time off — Friday afternoon and the following Monday. On Friday, I picked up my son from school and tackled my mother’s taxes. As for Monday, with my son on spring break and busy tutoring a friend’s son in math, I’m contemplating a few personal projects, like painting the chicken coop if the weather allows, or perhaps running errands, such as grocery shopping.
However, a deeper challenge lies in the work culture I’ve inadvertently fostered. By always being available and ready to solve problems — even to the point of doing others’ work and letting them take credit — I fear I’ve created an expectation of my constant availability and willingness to bail others out. This has led to a perception that I’m not a team player when I decline to complete someone else’s work or when I critique plans and suggest alternative approaches. After advising on a new direction, which momentarily got us back on track, I’ve seen the goalposts moved yet again. In part, I scheduled my Monday off as a test to see if those who’ve relied too heavily on me can manage on their own. It’s time for them to “sink or swim” — a necessary step for both their growth and my own.
This situation underscores a need for boundaries and more balanced expectations at work. It’s essential for team members to develop their problem-solving skills without always relying on a safety net. As I navigate my vacation time and personal responsibilities, I’m also reflecting on how to foster a more sustainable work environment — for my sake, for my family’s, and for the overall health of our team.
